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what do I do about my family being angry and no one will help me do the dishes??

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  • what do I do about my family being angry and no one will help me do the dishes??

    its sucks, I trying to think of something that can make it fair. my brother never wants to help out or do any work.

    our dishwasher is broken.

    which sucks, I want our work to be fair. my brother is always bossing me and my mother around!.

  • #2
    Relax. Your family is normal. Life isn't fair so while you can be fair, don't expect random events to exhibit fairness. (That would be magical thinking.)

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    • #3
      Stop whining!!!! When I was your age I was in the Army-------

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      • #4
        Is this a teen magazine forum now ?

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        • #5
          Originally posted by davidchill View Post
          its sucks, I trying to think of something that can make it fair. my brother never wants to help out or do any work.

          our dishwasher is broken.

          which sucks, I want our work to be fair. my brother is always bossing me and my mother around!.
          Take your headphones, turn on your favorite music and just do it. It always working.
          This is just another step of your life.

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          • #6
            Don't sweat the small things. Putting up with minor irritation from family members is just a normal part of life.

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            • #7
              Talk to him. Thats the best way ,Other ways lead to pitfalls another peaceful way is tolerance if you have it stir it with politness it will work wonders

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              • #8
                Welcome Uriah. Real life is never fair, so get used to not be fair too. No idea how old is your brother, but you need to get bossy and manage it between you too. Sure, not good to fight, so yell or in the final case, escalate to your father, but you really need to stand your ground.

                And yeah, otherwise get over it. I was also in the army when I was 18yo, so trust me, there are far more important issues around

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                • #9
                  well he is 14, and my dad is divorced and mother is too scared to tell him what to do, and my mother will call the police if we fight

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by davidchill View Post
                    well he is 14, and my dad is divorced and mother is too scared to tell him what to do, and my mother will call the police if we fight

                    My parents are also divorced, so I know. Don't fight. Get your brother in a room just the two of you when your mother is not at home, or if she is always at home, try to talk to him somewhere where she is not around (there must be time and place for this), then do a scandal to your brother, tell him this is not going to happen from now on only you to do the dishes, be strict and straight-forward. your voice must be a bit bass and imperative. tell him either he will start doing the dishes from now on or else ....**think of something here**....

                    And your mom should not call the police if you guys fight. this is not normal. brothers always fight at least once in a while and this is not a 911 issue. In fact the police should fine your mom for such a thing i think

                    if you're still not sure what to do, honestly go enroll with the military cadets - they there teach discipline, but also you will learn how to command since you will see how it's done. here in Toronto Canada, I see kids 13 and up going to the cadets and the kids look damn good

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by RaverWild View Post
                      And your mom should not call the police if you guys fight. this is not normal. brothers always fight at least once in a while and this is not a 911 issue. In fact the police should fine your mom for such a thing i think
                      that depends on how they fight.
                      I agree a normal fight is no issue and could solve the problem here, but when the parents missed to introduce some rules like don't choke, don't kick somebodys head with your shoe, don't use a knife and those things.....then it might be better to call the police on time.

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                      • #12
                        This isn't about fairness, but about your parents' ability to parent. They're divorced from each other, not from raising their children. And a little kid doesn't get to be the boss, something your mother needs to understand and start handling before it's too late.

                        First of all, where is your father in all this? If your mother can't handle your brother, then maybe your brother should try living with your father, at least for a while. If your father can't handle him either, then your parents should talk about getting him into counseling. The fact that your mother is afraid of him is scary, to be honest. And if counseling doesn't work, there is always the option of a military school or of a facility for difficult teens. No parent wants to do that, but sometimes it's necessary if they don't want their kid to end up in prison.

                        But it's a long road to that and your parents need to talk and agree on how to impose some common rules and how to be consistent. It's not your responsibility to raise your brother, but theirs, and they should be the ones to deal with him. If they refuse to, then look after yourself first, and start working towards living independently (I don't know how old you are, so that might not be possible for a while).

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