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Is it bad to have standards when I try to find someone who'll like me?

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  • Is it bad to have standards when I try to find someone who'll like me?

    Well, you see, my friends have been telling me that my standards are way at the top and I'll probably never find someone if I'm like this. But you see, I don't want just any relationship. I want something real. I've even considered covering myself with a "fake lover" but that would be unfair for my friends and the person who'll be with me. I just dunno. I really need advice. or just be told.

  • #2
    no... but i try not to be so picky. if i communicate well with someone, and they treat me right, i will maintain a relationship for as long as possible or until someone else comes along that catches my eye

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    • #3
      trait (type, character) ... visions of ....



      http://begin-english.ru/perevod-pesn...visions-of-you
      Last edited by dmitri11; 07-02-2018, 05:23 PM.

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      • #4
        It sounds like your standards aren't based on appearance, which is a good thing (though either way is understandable). But to find "real" love, it takes time and effort, I think. You need to really get to know someone and build a relationship before they'll start to reach such standards.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by sab564 View Post
          Well, you see, my friends have been telling me that my standards are way at the top and I'll probably never find someone if I'm like this.
          most of the times friends are right at that point - when they are real friends.
          What in particular are your standards?

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          • #6
            One standard is good, but two standards are better.

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            • #7
              No, it isn't bad to have standards for it, unless those are excessive ones.

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              • #8
                Love makes a man blind. Your "standard" must be blind or be out of his mind.




                http://www.oplala.ru/photo/animaldem...ators20615.jpg

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                • #9
                  Depends on the standards you have. There are good and bad ones.

                  Examples for good standards:
                  *sincere
                  *real connection
                  *loyal
                  *intelligent

                  Examples for bad standards:
                  *at least 1,80m
                  *has to look like a model
                  *min. income of XX
                  *owns a house

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                  • #10
                    You need to take a chance. Standards are good to save you some time, but you hardly know if the relationship you're starting is going to be a real deep and lasting one.
                    So there's no reason why you shouldn't be a little picky - if that's part of who you are, why fight it ? But you need to take a chance sometimes, the person you consider might not tick all the boxes but that will always be the case. I don't believe in the perfect match. Most of the time those who appeared as perfect for each other broke at some point. So, high standards : good, perfection : forget it !

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by theuglyduckling View Post
                      Depends on the standards you have. There are good and bad ones.

                      Examples for good standards:
                      *sincere
                      *real connection
                      *loyal
                      *intelligent
                      That's a little bit too general and somehow mandatory for relationship

                      Originally posted by theuglyduckling View Post
                      Examples for bad standards:
                      *at least 1,80m
                      *has to look like a model
                      *min. income of XX
                      *owns a house
                      Not necessary bad, as far as the person can fulfill these standards by itself.

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                      • #12
                        The standardization could not replace your fantasies to a playful dialogue with men ... One day you will meet the "standard" and hate it.

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                        • #13
                          I think that it's right that you have standards, because you can't stay with someone whom you don't want to be. But if you use this standards for to don't talk or meet new persons, maybe you have to change your mind and only use them for choose your couple. I think that if you try to deal with people without standards, maybe you can find interesting people and maybe new standards that you like them.

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