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It's Always During the Worst Times

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  • It's Always During the Worst Times

    I can't get you off my mind,
    And I wonder why.
    Maybe it was the bite mark you left on my neck.
    Maybe it was her
    As I screw some chick
    Who looks just like you --
    With dark hair, dark eyes--dark skin-- and dark lips
    Wearing black clothes and black nail polish,
    Or maybe it was the last time we were on stage,
    As I listen to every word,
    Wanting your poems to be about me.

    I can't get you off my mind,
    As I write this,
    Wanting you to listen to me
    While I recite it--on a dark stage--in the spotlight.
    I thought you were gone again,
    And now we are back for literally the fifth time,
    And it seems somehow right.
    We were always perfectly wrong for each other,
    And our relationship completely organic and spontaneous.
    Now GOd's forced us together again
    As if it's the first moment we met
    When you were sitting alone writing a poem
    As if the world I showed you stands still.

    Now look at me on stage again,
    And everything I've accomplished
    And everything you've done.
    I'm me again--but a stranger too.
    I'm stuck in my life,
    The same one
    As we drank Arabic coffee out of little glass cups
    The same one
    With Sufi poets, Senators, and PhDs
    The same one
    As I stand on a dark stage--in the spotlight.

    I can't get you off my mind
    While I write--as I
    Kn owing that half of what I say
    Should never be said, say it anyway.
    I want you, not forever, but so I can fell
    Like the universe in not completely fucked up
    But I need you to see the world through my eyes,
    My world of poets, Senators, and PhDs.
    I need you; in a world I do not belong,
    You were there--after the show--with me.
    Now i'm lost--like you're the only one out there
    Somewhere--on a dark stage--in the spotlight--reciting,
    "I can't get you off my mind )Trust me. I've tried)."